Review of Transporter 3

Is this from a comic book? Like who sees these movies? Is this like Blade?

I love Wesley Snipes. I mean, he's cheesy as shit, but I just love that guy.

Review of Bolt

I smell Travolta.

Review of Twilight

This movie is SO! AWESOME!

I LOVE VAMPIRES!!!!!!!!!!!!

Review of Four Christmases

You think four christmases is tough? Try five, you dipshits.

Review of Australia

I don't think that's really the movie poster.

But then again, I don't think this is really a movie.

Review of The Day the Earth Stood Still

Not still enough.

Review of Quantum of Solace

The architecture of that hotel was perfect for long, drawn-out explosion scenes. I'm happy there was less testicular mutilation scenes in this film than in the last Bond. Don't get me wrong, I'd still like to stay at that hotel. I dig the eco-industrial design aesthetic.

Review of Stardust

The chick from that TV show glows when she gets horny.